Sunday, November 7, 2010

Adult Truths



ADULT TRUTHS


1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

 18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
Ladies.....Quit Laughing.

15 comments:

  1. LOL! I'm pretty sure I'm glad that I'd finished my coffee by the time I'd read these!

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  2. I can sympathize with most of these! You left out never being able to find your reading glasses, and I am pretty sure that mine hide from me because when I do find them their right in front of me. Love this list!

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  3. I can relate to most of these! (I don't have a car, so that eliminates those for me.)

    BTW, I only learned how to fold a fitted sheet a couple of years ago.

    And I've been tired since I was 19 years old.

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  4. #5. I still can't fold a fitted sheet. when I am finished it always looks like a round lumpy ball.
    #22. I have done that many times.

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  5. Those fitted sheets have so bugged me all these years. Along with a few more. Thanks for sharing. So many so true. Have a wonderfull week. Hugs Carrie

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  6. Love # 24 !!!!! hahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahah

    Oooppsss ... too loud?

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  7. This post made everybody happy on Sunday:-)
    I really enjoy to read and especially #5 #14 #19 and #24. after all I have a good moods:-)
    Big Hugs,
    xoxox
    Sis.

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  8. Those are great and there are many I can relate to. The MapQuest thing really gets me. I have been sent completely around in a circle toward the west to connect to the Interstae highway on the east side of town.

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  9. Map quest told me how to get out of my driveway.

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  10. BEST, BEST, BEST laugh I've had in years! And every single thing so darn true! Whew, I sure am glad I put down that glass when I started reading. I would have spewed all over the place (lovely visual of an old woman, isn't it...a spewing-white-hair). Carole, you took the cake with this post :D ...and that little smiley should show shaking laughter.

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  11. These are funny. Although, a couple (at least) are just a bit too close to home. :-)

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