Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Let's see...How Can I Put This?

I have a question that I have thought about regarding how to ask it of anyone who might read this. I have no answering thought so I will plunge right in.

Usually when you hear the phrase "I hate cats!" said with emphasis, it is stated by a man.  Of course there are females too who don't like cats or who have a phobia about them as do some men but:  when you hear "I hate cats!" it is usually stated by a man. I want to make the distinction that I am not referring to the man who says "I prefer dogs" or the one who says "I don't care for cats".  I am speaking of the one who says he hates cats.

Alright, all that being said..preamble having been written..what is my point?  I must add another thing before I get to the point.   :-)  (so female of me).

If you are familiar with cats, let's say you own one or are around folks who do have a cat in the family,  many times you can tell a male cat from a female one.  Male cats sometimes have a slightly larger head and a bit more rounded in the face.  Females, the opposite.  However, many folks see all cats as looking feminine.  Yes, they do look feminine in a sense of the word if you equate that feminine look with softness, beauty,  the large lustrous eyes, the show of affection the kitty gives when he/she trusts you.  Just whatever strikes any individual, as to the similarities they fancy they see. Whatever the resemblance is to women at large, I am finally getting to my point.

Do men who literally hate cats tend to be abusive to women?  Do they equate cats to women if you will,  and fail to see cats as an innocuous and innocent pet just as dogs and gerbils etc are, simply because they really hate women?  Are these the ones who are so cruel and violent to an innocent animal simply because something in their life caused them to hate women?

I have Googled this and while I have found articles that support my view (I only looked today as I was going to cite one as a reference but have chosen not to as they may be copyrighted).

But this is just a general question, not completely unreasonable a juxtaposition I would say.  I imagine not many if any will agree with me.

Last statement will be that men who do have cats as pets or like them in general are frequently seen by women as more desirable as a marriage partner.  Could it be that men who like or love cats are innately more tender in their actions?  Who knows.  That does not presuppose that folks who like dogs are not good partners.  Remember what I was at pains to say in my second paragraph.  I drew a distinction.


21 comments:

  1. Interesting question. I don't know any men who actually "hate" cats. My boss claimed not to like them, but his partner has a cat and he's been with her for quite a long time now. So there you go.

    I would hypothesize that it's not that the cat looks feminine, generally speaking, but more that the cat is independent and can't be controlled, unlike a dog (or other animal). I could imagine an abusive man might hate cats for that reason alone, nothing to do with a cat appearing in any way feminine.

    But truthfully, I've never thought of this before!

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  2. Oh, also that a cat isn't going to pander to the male ego. Or anyone's ego, for that matter.

    And frankly, all the men I've met have, in one way or another and to varying degrees, needed to have their egos stroked (not a euphemism) and told how good/whatever they are about this or that. They won't get that abject adoration and ego-pandering from a cat. :-)

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  3. Very thought-provoking. Also here we don't think we know anyone who actually hates cats (figure we wouldn't be likely to be friends!). I do think those who like cats tend to be more kind-hearted, a little less testosterone-charged. So more likable to women in general. Had a visit from a couple who have no pets, are rather fastidious and I bet a dog would be as out of place as a cat. Hubby there did suggest only somewhat jokingly that if we are having so much trouble traveling because of the cats, there IS the pound........ I like him intellectually, but feel he is pretty self centered too.
    Just today, my hubby carefully arranged a nip naner and catnip snake next to the Ess for the kitties to encounter and become interested in. No cat hater would ever do something like that!
    The Mom here at casa de Simba

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  4. I have never had a cat as a pet although I have been around family and friends who have cats. I think they are beautiful. Very interesting post Twin! xoxo

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  5. I have never given this any thought at all. Our male cat musters up all the energy he can to follow my husband down to the garden. We both like the independence of a cat, actually.

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  6. I haven't known anyone who says they hate cats but my theory has been that they say they hate cats because they don't understand them unlike a dog who's feelings are pretty much out there. Some men can't understand women which may go with the theory of cats and women being like each other. That would go with the idea that women like men who like cats since those men can figure out both the cat and the woman! Who knows but I hope I never come across a true cat hater since I'm pretty sure we'd never get along!

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  7. Well, looking at it from the opposite viewpoint, I am always utterly delighted when I come across men who absolutely adore cats! I have had several occasions when couples have come to stay with me, and I have discovered that, of the two, it is the man who goes totally gaga over my cats and plays with them all the time!

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    1. That's what I'm talking about really. There are cat men. We love them when we meet them. :-)

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  8. I truly believe that anyone who says they hate cats doesn't really like animals or they could be an ailurophobe! I think you can prefer dogs or prefer cats or prefer budgies, but if you say "I hate .. " even if you've been attacked by one, then you are making a value judgement just based on personal experience or prejudice. It's like saying I hate all waiters! Why? You haven't met every waiter!

    Just saying :) BTW I have heard more women say they hate cats than men!

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  9. Dear Sis!
    Any cats as same with dogs too but I love feminine cats are more likely my situation just like me and you to Sis!
    They are more like us LADY is that way I feel understand all the time.
    One thing with me about all ways worry about cats or dogs for too much with me because I don't stays home for most of time only night time and going out with again....
    Admiral's was just like me went outside all the time and went other country as well!
    Katie's driving car's with you coming soon!
    xoxoxo
    Sis,Katie,Miyuki,and Victoria,
    Michiko

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  10. Wow how interesting! I've never thought of this but you have very good point!
    I haven't known a man who says he hates cats so I don't really have answer, but I do think men who like/love cats tend to be more gentle-hearted :-)
    I have three female coworkers who hate cats. One of them stated "cats are evil." I wonder if they have never experienced communication with cats or had bad experience with cats. I was bitten by dog when I was a kid but it didn't stop me from loving dogs, though.

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  11. So why this line of inquiry, have you met a man that Hates Cats? I was raised with animals of all kinds in my youth. I love and respect all animals. I would say that only a city dweller could be an animal hater, that means cats and other animals. I think mainly because they don't or can't understand them.

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  12. OK, a guy here (TBT). You've opened up a real can of worms. First, a recent study showed that men who are unshaven, do only "guy things" around the yard (mow lawn, cut trees) will more likely have sex more often. Second, men who sport week-long beards have sex more often. Third, married men on travel have sex with strangers more often than single guys (they know how to talk to women).

    Men generally like dogs. They are are more trainable, responsive to commands, and dominatible.

    In another realm, women are more attracted to dominating men during ovulation. And more responsive to men who would be "sensitive dads" at the other times.

    Guys who love cats are the "sensitive dads" who will stick around to raise the children and support the family.

    I'm not making this up; its the conclusions of the studies I read In Scientific American and such. And it is "evolution in action". Women seek what they desire at different times just as men do. And we each push each other in the genetic directions we seek for our own subconcious purposes. Sorry if I am a bit blunt about that. Sometimes, you just have to find the truth. ~ Mark

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  13. i have been around cats my whole life and though I don't personally own a cat my landlords have one and she has taken quite a shine to me. I think (actually I know) it's because I pay attention to it. I know all the places to scratch. My landlords don't mistreat the cat and it's well fed but they don't pay much attention to it. I am greeted every day while I arrive home from work.

    I like dogs but they require much more attention than cats. My sisters have cats and we had them all the years growing up.
    Oops! Gotta go to work.

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  14. What an interesting thought. Jack is not fond of cats but has lived with them most of his life. His mother and all his sisters have cats. Danielle's husband is a cat person, and both of these men are very caring and loving to both women and animals. Guess I'm not much help in answering your question.

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  15. Wow that is one serious question. Oh my brain isn't functioning at this time of the morning to even put together my thoughts on this one. Hope you figure it all out and have a wonderful day. Hugs Carrie

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  16. I have experience with this.
    Men who do not like cats do not like them mainly because they cannot be controlled like a dog. They want obedience. They want this from the people in their life also.
    Men like this will actually accuse the cat of giving them "judgmental" or "evil" looks.
    Why? Because they feel self hate.
    The ones I have been involved with also were cruel to animals.

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  17. Interesting question, Carole!

    As a man who loves all animals (but especially cats), I've never really understood anyone who says they "hate" a certain species, be it a cat, dog, or whatever else. Interestingly, there have been cats at the shelter where we volunteer who were afraid of men (we assume because they had bad experiences with them), but who responded well to me.

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  18. I have not had any personal experience, but I have read statistics where men who abuse cats can and do also abuse women. Unfortunately, I do believe it's true., It's funny because my husband never told me he didn't like cats until I sent him a letter when he was overseas with the ARMY in Korea telling him I got the cutest little kitten. He never said a word about not liking cats, but he did tell me about it a few years later - after thoroughly falling for all 4 of our cats through the years. The first few years he wouldn't admit it tho - I think it was a male ego thing that said "real men" don't like cats. But this was back in the 50's and 60's when men still had that macho idea about men!! Very interesting post that made my think a bit.

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  19. methinks anyone who hates cats, dogs or any animal is missing something crucial inside Carole, I can understand a phobia through a bad experience, but if you equate this with bad experiences with either sex,human-wise, well, you don't go off all of the species now do you?...In fact, now you mention it, a man I knew, (and now don't) hated my Bess, was actually jealous in fact, which changed my attitude towards him, and he was very controlling. So in a way, My girl saved me from him. Now that's put a smile on my face. A thought provoking post, indeed. hugs aplenty... love to you and Li'l Kate... xPenx

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  20. Of the people who have said to me that they HATE cats, one hundred percent grew up in rural situations but not all have been men. To be honest, I think that you could come up with a rationale, but the bottom line is it is a learned bias, just like all hatred.

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