Ladies and Gentlemen of the blogosphere, I am Rusty Ethics, junior partner at the legal firm of Dewey, Cheatham & Howe. Our client, one Miss Catt, has retained our firm to defend her good name. It has come to her attention that some remarks have been made about her - defamatory remarks - and she wishes to set the record straight. Our client reports that on the evening in questions, she was visiting with Miss Diva (whose blog carries the defaming entry [below]) and had settled down to watch opera. She even had her cat sized opera glasses at the ready. Right when the opera was about to start, she heard a commotion in the kitchen. She was hoping to help with any problem and thus ambled leisurely into the kitchen. What she found was a crazed turkey. It had basted itself and cooked itself. When she entered, it had Miss Diva’s family pinned against the wall, demanding to get its stuffing back. In order to protect the family, she leapt into action. She ate the turkey to prevent it from overpowering the family. Some people would seek glory and fame for such heroic deeds. But, our client is humble and would never seek attention. However, since Miss Diva has blogged about the incident, our client feels it is important to state the correct facts for her admiring public.
She will, in a related note, be suing Miss Diva for 100 cans of Chicken Hearts ‘n Livers Fancy Feast and 1 jumbo crate of catnip filled toys. Our law firm advises Miss Diva to settle now. Our client is hungry.